I asked that a serious question be answered first. Was this rule about Switches, that had been put in place over a year ago, going to be changed back to how it was before, with both Dominant and submissive discussions being open to Switches and of course Switch discussions being open to all.
The response I received was that it would be left to the individual bias and prejudice of each discussion facilitator and should a facilitator decide to block Switches from attending, they may ask for verification of what someone identified as (“papers papers, where are your BDSM papers!?”) or decide to boot based on rumor.
A cop out so that management would not have to make a firm decision, make a statement about Fallen values, and actually lead. All in the name of making “most” feel comfortable. Somehow this seemed justified. Hey it doesn’t affect the majority so what do they care, right?
After recounting my tale, I was told by a friend that there are no rights on Second Life.
I laughed because I suppose they are right.
If the the Voting Rights Act and Civil Rights Act had been left up to some in Second Life, I’m inclined to believe after today that women wouldn’t have the vote and we’d still have segregation in the U.S.
After all, once the majority feels comfortable, everything is justified. That was the bill of goods someone attempted to sell me today. Thank the Goddess that the U.S. doesn’t rely on popular vote for such things.
I returned to Fallen Angels BDSM Club in Second Life in June of this year (2012). I worked there previously for about 10 months and left in May of 2011.
I returned because I was told by one of the previous owners, someone I respect, that things were changing and the old Fallen was being brought back. She was already back. I was amazed and ecstatic. She told me to come and I bounced right over.
I hadn’t stepped foot in the place for 14 months.
I left, others left, and then the club proceeded to spiral into a junior high state of cliques and ranks. All I ever heard about Fallen from friends was bad news for more than a year after I quit.
I am a cautious person by nature. I’ve let passions get the better of me in SL and made a firm decision that this time around, I would have clear perspective. Second Life is but one aspect of reality and not the most important aspect by far.
I was re-instated to all my former duties and roles and took up the regular Saturday munches. I was asked to lead other discussions that align with my interests and who I am. Daddy and babygirl discussion groups. Polyamory discussion groups.
I declined because I wanted to get my bearings and see which way was up at Fallen now. Was the place really changing for the better again? I also didn’t want to burn out as I had before. I kept my distance as the last gasps of drama from those who had brought Fallen low were sounded.
Some were asked to leave and some left of their own volition. With a slew of unnecessary dramatic flourishes in the staff group and main group.
The facilitator for the Switch discussion group became vacant though I don’t know if that was related to the nonsense above. No details were given to me. But I was asked if I would step in.
This goes back to the reason I left Fallen to begin with.
The majority decided that Switches, a group of people who identify as both Dominant and submissive, would be blocked from attending either Dominant or submissive discussion groups. The reason was “safety”.
Apparently Switches inherently have a flaw in character which threatens the safety of those who aren’t Switches.
I was disgusted by this and as usual, those who this little rule did not affect had no problem with it.
It was ironic because previously there was such a outcry against having a TNG group (The Next Generation, aimed at 18-35 demographic in the bdsm community) within Fallen because older members felt their sense of entitlement disturbed. How dare someone try to exclude them from something? It’s always a travesty when it’s “you” and a shame when it’s “them”.
June 2012 - July 2012
Nothing has changed.
I am happy that I have some knowledge of how BDSM groups and clubs work in First Life. They are inclusive and seek to educate and they flourish because of that. There is a keen understanding of what being a Dominant, Submissive and Switch means. This sensitivity leads to the needs of the entire group being addressed without a stigma being placed on anyone. And safety is always uncompromisingly maintained.
The age of Fallen Angels BDSM Club being the gold standard on Second Life and the closest thing people will get to a First Life BDSM club in a virtual world is done.
I’ve cut all ties to Fallen. It was one step on a journey and I have better things to do than deal with the same old nonsense all over again. I’ll keep to being centered on what BDSM actually is and let others continue to play make-believe at being BDSM leadership.